The Fancy Floridian answers your questions about why superheroes wear impractical footwear to fight aliens and how to feel ten feet tall with or without heels.
Today we’re answering our FashionEarstas’ fanmail about a very important question: why do superheroes fight crime in heels?!?
Is Black Widow’s superpower really that she can do flips and fight aliens in high heels? I love her but thinking about her shoes always makes me cringe! #letsuperheroeswearsneakers
-High Heel Hater
Dear High Heel Hater,
I know exactly what costumes you’re referring to and, yes, they’re both cringey and possibly breaking the laws of physics. We’ve seen superheroes like Natasha Romanoff fight mobsters and aliens in everything from pointe shoes to stilettos, and while she is a total baller for being able to do that, it does seem a little disingenuous to ask little kids (and big kids) reading her comics to emulate her choices in footwear.
Plenty of other superheroes have gotten this treatment, and in the past even the men haven’t been exempt! But fortunately Marvel Studios (the makers of marvel movies and Disney+ series) seem to have gotten the memo in the past decade or so. While heroes like Scarlet Witch and Valkyrie do wear sky-high wedges and Natasha enjoys a nice heel on her day off, it’s now harder to find costumes that incorporate heels than it is to find practical footwear.
As Marvel hires more female directors and costume designers, we hope to see their superheroes fight crime in heels, flats, barefoot! As long as it’s what makes sense for the character and not just what a male producer or comic artist thinks makes female heroes look hot.
So, if rocking 4-inch platform boots or Louboutins is what makes you feel confident, WORK IT! Superhero style is about what makes you feel powerful, not what you think should make you feel heroic.
I personally like to clomp around Walt Disney World in petticoats and heels and when strange men tell me “wow I bet your feet hurt” I just smile at them because they don’t know that wearing heels for 8 hours of walking is my superpower. So you do you, High Heel Hater!
If you do want some suggestions for footwear that gives you that superhero vibe without the possibility of a heel-induced wipeout, I do have a few suggestions!
Wanda’s Chunky Combat Wedges
Wanda Maximoff had a rebellious teenager phase just like most of us did! Well… she kind of became a supervillain in her rebellious teen phase but she grew out of it pretty fast!
Throw it back to your own teenage years because Dr. Martens boots are back in fashion and taller than ever. We think Wanda would rock an Averil wedge boot – it has a bit more height than your traditional docs and keeps the chunky heel and rubber sole aesthetic.
Valkyrie’s Very Tall Sneakers
In my humble opinion, Valkyrie’s 80s-inspired armor in Thor: Ragnarok was one of the sartorial highlights in all of the MCU. Honestly, Valkyrie could wear Ugg boots and I’d still love her, but fortunately for everyone her footwear is slightly more glamorous!
Skechers has gotten into the high-heeled sneaker game with their surprisingly comfortable and affordable Million – Air Up There Sneakers. The gold trim and metallic embellishments on this pair make it the perfect compromise between fashion and practicality!
Captain Marvel’s Vans
When Carole Danvers returns to earth in the 90s, she finds Blockbuster Movies, a young Nick Fury, and 90s fashion. While we don’t get a great look at her shoes in this part of the film, I’d bet that based on her biker jacket and distressed jeans that Carole would be a Vans Girl.
Crank up the set list from the 1995 Vans Warped Tour as you fight Skrulls (or Kree) in these Vans Sk8-Hi Captain Marvel sneakers! They’re unisex, which feels appropriate for Captain Marvel. Why should the ladies have to pay more money for “feminine” sneakers if they don’t want to?
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Did any of these non-traditional superhero kicks inspire you, Heel Hater? Whether you decided to stick with flats or sign up for extra karate classes that you can take in stilettos, I’m sure you’ll be confident (and therefore fabulous)!
Do you know have a question for one of our FashionEarstas? We’d LOVE to hear from you! You can also find us on Instagram and Facebook (@fashionearsta), Pinterest, and our brand new YouTube channel! Be sure to follow us so that you’re always in the loop!
Pixie dust and glamour!
The Fancy Floridian